my question-

Thanks a lot guys really appreciate your time and efforts for addressing our concerns.
I am narrating my experience and I really need your inputs on this. I will be really thankful to all of you. I Know it is a lot of text to go through but I have tried my best to include all dates and my symptoms.

On February 14th I kissed my friend for the first time and we DEEP KISSED for a few days. After that I got a terrible sore throat. After this we decided to have sex. My Penis was semi erect when I wore the condom and penetrated into her. Since I wasn't completely erect I stopped and laid down on the bed for a few seconds and after a few seconds I removed the condom which had vaginal fluids. We decided to do it again. While removing the condom I had FLIPPED it around i.e. turned it inside out and then wore it again. Later on I realized that there were VAGINAL FLUIDS on the condom which in turn might have come into CONTACT WITH MY PENIS. Besides that there was no penetration, therefore no sex.

Around second week of March I fell terribly ill. It was like the WORST FEVER EVER. The illness had me bed ridden for 5 days and with medication I was fine by day 6.

Then in April roughly 1st week of April she performed ORAL SEX on me for approximately 2 minutes and I performed oral sex on her for not more than 5 seconds. April I had an upset stomach.

On June 15th I felt one SWOLLEN CERVICAL LYMPH NODE on the left side of my neck. God knows how long it has been there. Not at all painful and not visible. Its presence can be felt only when touched. It is tender.

On 28th June my PHYSICIAN AND ULTRASOUND CONFIRMED a swollen node. But my physician said it was within the swollen range so it is normal. But I had no other sickness around that period. My physician wasn't very helpful and on asking a few questions he ridiculously told me to leave. In June for 2 weeks I had JOINT and MUSCLE PAIN in both elbows and both knows as well as ankles and shoulders and NECK. This pain would last for a few seconds and would kept coming a few times in a day. I never had any night sweats. In July I had an upset stomach. I still have the lymph node in the neck and now I feel a bump near my elbow too.

Anxiety is killing me. From my experience is it possible to contract any infection? Is any test suggested and how reliable is the rapid hiv test? My fear is the vaginal fluids that came in contact with my penis when the condom was flipped and worn again and the oral sex she performed.

I had a rapid insti finger prick test done at 89 days and it came out to be negative. Is the insti finger prick test real? I mean no laboratory testing is involved. Is there any further testing required? Can this be conclusive

Your response-

It is great to hear you've contact us, as it sounds like there are a few areas with which we could provide some insight. I am going to do my best to address your concerns as you've noted them above:

-Please don't reuse condoms in any manner, inside out, right side out or otherwise. This poses a greater risk for tearing and breakage-putting you and your partner at a higher risk of HIV/STI transmission as well as pregnancy. Always use a new, unexpired (find expiry on the back!) condom with each new sexual activity. They definitely can be expensive, this I know! However, free condoms are available everywhere these days, public bathrooms, bars and clubs, sexual health clinics, university, health and community fairs, etc. If you are having trouble finding free condoms in your area, let us know and we will help you track some down.

-Although vaginal fluid can contain HIV (if the person is HIV positive), the virus dies almost immediately once exposed to air, and cannot enter your body through your skin. HIV transmission occurs via the mucous membranes inside the body, during unprotected intercourse and sharing of used needles. Both of these things offer a close quarters, near airtight or airtight environment.

-Tests obtained at or after 12 weeks, 84 days or 3 months is considered completely conclusive by the World Health Organization. Your 89 days, if no other instances of exposure happened in between that 89 days and the time you tested, this finger prick is considered conclusive.

I would urge you to move forward with this, look into the proper use of condoms and where to gather some free ones, and connect with your doctor regarding other causes of your symptoms. It is more likely that you have transmitted a cold or flu virus vs the HIV virus. As well, if these symptoms were being caused by HIV, the virus would certainly have been found in your testing.

Hope this helps to clear things up for you, all the best!


I would like to reply to that -

The condom was never used before. It was the first time I used it and after that act I discarded it. But there was no penetration. Its just that I tried having sex but I was not completely erect so I just stopped, waited for a while may be 40 seconds) then decided to try again. It was then I flipped the condom and wore the same one again and later realized there were vaginal fluids on it. But even second time I wasn't erect and thus no sex no intercourse.
Besides this was the unprotected oral both receiving and giving.

Between those 89 days there was no other intimate experience I had with anyone thus no exposure. So im pretty sure I got tested after 89 days from the last time I deep kissed that girl and we just kissed the last time nothing else. Body pains and lymph nodes were experienced before I got tested.

But talking about the test, I had the test at a community center and it was the rapid finger prick test. Is the test reliable enough? I mean does that membrane really work. No doubt I have read about it on various sites. But there is no blood laboratory testing involved. So If there was anything wrong it would have shown up on the test.

Talking about the lymph nodes, I have had them since almost 4 months and there are the same since then tender and moveable. You mentioned the flu virus, but such lymph nodes should go away in no time, right?I want to know what is the size of the lymph nodes and how long do they last for? Are they visible or they can remain tiny and palpable? Mine cant be seen, the one in the neck is kind of more palpable in the morning when I wake up and after an hour or so it becomes less palpable.

So 89 days is the perfect time to get tested, isn't it? I am still considering to go for another test of the same kind and at the same place just to get done with my anxiety once and for all. In anonymous testing identity remains hidden, right?

Once again thank you guys.
Hello There,

Thank you for posting on the AIDS Vancouver Helpline Forum.

If there was no penetration then there was no direct access of any HIV-borne fluids into your bloodstream.

HIV is a weak virus and needs to live in a controlled environment like the inside of the body and in the barrel of syringes.

As my fellow volunteer Katie has already answered you, HIV dies upon exposure to air. Therefore, even if the vaginal fluid that has touched your skin was HIV positive, HIV would not have been active for transmission. As well as the fact that skin is a great barrier for HIV infection.

As for oral sex, there is negligible risk for receiving oral sex meaning there has never been a confirmed report of that activity being attributed to HIV infection. Giving oral sex, however, is a low risk activity meaning it poses the potential for HIV infection because it involves an exchange of body fluids. There have been a few reports of infection attributed to this activity.

Kissing is a no risk activity, therefore there is no need to worry about that in terms of HIV transmission. Saliva in the mouth contains an enzyme that kills the virus.

As Katie has previously said, your results are conclusive at the 89 days since HIV test results are conclusive at the 3-month cut off post exposure.

As for symptoms, there are no clinically identifiable symptoms associated with HIV. We only rely on test results for HIV diagnosis. The symptoms you are experiencing may be related to a different infection.

The test you have taken is a reliable test. You need to partner with your doctor about the lymph nodes. They are not associated with HIV, which means only a doctor is able to answer these questions.

89 days is the time when test results are conclusive. It is under your own discretion to get retested and yes anonymous remains anonymous.

Hope this helps!

Please let us know if we can provide any more information. Or if you would like to call and speak to someone at the Helpline, you can do so anonymously and confidentially by calling 604-696-4666, Monday to Friday between 9am-4pm.

All the Best,


AIDS Vancouver Helpline Volunteer


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